And the Angels Sing

They all told me it went fast, that the pregnancy was the longest part.  I politely smiled and nodded, all the while thinking they were nuts.  A year is a year is a year, right?  Anyone who feels that they are zooming by at a breakneck pace simply isn't taking the time to stop and smell the roses.

That was then.

Now, as I watch The Princess getting bigger every single day, I wonder where the last four years went.  I certainly haven't been neglecting my responsibility to stop and smell the roses.  Hell, I was out of work for nine months, every moment of which was spent with my family, every moment of which was savored to the fullest.

I am well aware of the fact that The Hubbs and I have been blessed with a charmed life.  Since we met, everything has simply fallen into place.  All we've had to do is put one foot in front of the other, and life seems to take care of itself.  We met and dated for a whopping six months before he proposed to me on a beach in Michigan.  Seven months later, we bought our house.  A month after that, we were ecstatic to welcome our first fur kid into the family.  Another four months, and we were married.

We toodled around the house, making it our own.  Seven months after we were married, we welcomed our second fur kid into the family.  Less than three months later, I took the test that would change our lives forever.

A whirlwind: that's what those nine months of pregnancy really were.  Everyone says it's the longest part, that time when you're waiting to meet the little person who's been kicking you in the tummy.  For me, it went so fast.  I never felt better in my entire life than when I was pregnant...no morning sickness, very little fatigue, and that didn't come until the last few days if I'm being completely honest.  I didn't swell up, didn't even get too many off-the-wall food cravings.  Taco Bell, sure, but that's just a day in the life for me.

Then came the last doctor's appointment, that Tuesday evening when I was to report to the office for my final checkup...if I was still pregnant by then, anyway.  And, boy, was I pregnant.  Forty weeks, and this little person seemed to be hunkering down for a good, long stay.  She had no intention whatsoever of leaving her cozy little abode in my enormous swollen tummy.

We packed our bags and dropped The Girls off with The Grumps, knowing that I would be checking into the hospital that very evening.  I saw my midwife for the final checkup, and she called ahead to the hospital to let them know I was coming, and that they'd be inducing labor bright and early in the morning.  She held our hands and smiled all the way up to her twinkling eyes as she told us we'd meet our little boy or girl in mere hours.  At that point, we didn't know if we were to be welcoming a prince or a princess...only that we were eager to meet this little nudger after so many months spent speculating.

Leaving the doctor's office, we decided to have one last high-class meal before becoming parents, so we stopped at the McDonald's across the street from the hospital.  We feasted on burgers, fries, and soda.  For dessert, we stopped at the gas station for candy bars, and in a moment of pure genius decided to stock up on Gatorade.

Checking in at the hospital, we unpacked our necessities and took care of the most important preparation of all: the music.  The entire time we were there, we were joined by Billie Holiday, Duke Ellington, Benny Goodman, and Ella Fitzgerald.  The entire staff of the maternity ward marvelled at how calm and serene our room seemed, and many of them drifted in and out over the next day or so to see what was playing.

After I was set up with all of my monitors, one kindly nurse convinced The Hubbs that he'd get a better night's rest at home in his own bed.  After all, she said, I'd need him to be strong and alert the next day.  So he headed home.

I fell asleep almost instantly.

At seven o'clock on the nose, on the morning of Wednesday, April 11, 2007, I was awakened by my midwife and the doctor with whom she practices.  It was time to induce. 

Where, though, was my knight in shining armor?

"Look outside," they told me.  "He should be here soon, but you don't want him hurrying through this."

And that's when I saw it: a white-out snow storm in the middle of April.  Gotta love the midwest!  I spoke to The Hubbs on his way to the hospital, and he assured me he'd be there soon enough.

Over the next nine hours and forty-some minutes, we were again joined by our jazz greats.  I was told that I was doing great, oh, I don't know...maybe seven hundred times?  All I could think was how badly I wanted to meet this little person, and, even when I nearly broke The Hubbs' hand during a contraction, I was giddy with excitement.

At just before 4:45 pm on this day, to the tune of "And the Angels Sing" by Benny Goodman and his band, the axis of my world shifted.  She was here.  She was mine.  She was, is, everything - and more than - I ever could have wished for.

My Princess.

Baby girl, your momma loves you more than you could ever possibly know.  The day you were born, you flipped a switch in me.  Nothing else, as long as I live, will ever matter to me as much as you do.  You are my sun, my moon, my everything.

I am so proud of you, it's beyond my ability to put it into words.  I see the beautiful little girl you're becoming, and your sweet and sometimes teasing nature is truly something to behold.  Your laugh, your smile, every little thing about you just makes me burst with pride.

When I was a kid, everyone always asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up.  At five years old, I told them that when I was 25, I would be married, have a house and a dog, and I'd be a mommy.  Interestingly enough, I was mostly right.  At 25, I was married with a house and two dogs, and you were growing in my tummy.  Less than three weeks after I turned 26, you made all my dreams come true.

Dreams so big, so wonderful, that I never in a million years would have dared to dream them. 

Every day since then, dear Princess, has been even better than the one before.  I never knew how much one could learn from a person who is so small.  Never again will I make the mistake of underestimating the power of anyone on this earth...especially you.

For if you've been able to teach me so much already, how in the world could you possibly be done?

Up until the day I met you face to face, I had absolutely no worldly idea how much love there was in my heart.  Now, every time I look into your sparkling eyes, that love continues to grow.

Today, my sweet little Princess, you turn four years old.  These have been, beyond the shadow of a doubt, the best four years of my life thus far.

I love you.  Happy, happy birthday, Princess.  Thank you for being you.