More and more, The Princess is mimicking things we do. More and more, those things include sounds. More and more, I'm absolutely gobsmacked by the progress she's making and overwhelmingly grateful that I am here to witness it.
About a week ago, I sat in my computer chair with an extremely engaged little person on my lap, smiling and staring into my eyes with an intensity I never would have thought possible if you'd have asked me three years ago. The twinkle in her little peepers said Come on, Momma. Let's play.
I said, "Puh, puh, puh."
She said, "Puh, puh, puh."
I said, "Tuh, tuh, tuh."
She said, "Tuh, tuh, tuh."
These are two sounds she's been mimicking for a while now. She was still all engaged and twinkly, so I got brave and tried a new one that's never worked before.
I said, "La, la, la."
She snapped her little mouth shut and looked at me - I mean really looked. She reached out and touched my lips, stuck her tongue out and I could almost see the gears turning in her head. She moved her little hand on my mouth, very effectively asking me to say it again.
Me: "La, la, la, la, la."
Her: A determined look slapped on her pretty little face, she stuck her tongue out between her teeth and said - perfectly, on the first try - "La, la, laaaaa."
Sunday, May 26, 2013
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
Hope
I am happy to report that The Fabulous Mrs. G. is living up to her name - no big surprise there, but reassuring nonetheless.
After the incident at The Princess's spring music program, The Hubbs and I decided to keep The Princess home from school until we reached a resolution. The Fabulous Mrs. G. called me Monday morning, and I learned a lot in the space of about twenty minutes. It seems that The Princess and Z have been paired together for most activities in school recently, and the initial solution involves pairing them off with other classmates to separate them from one another.
Starting on Tuesday, each of the girls has a new partner for each of her activities, and the classroom staff will be keeping a closer eye out for this type of behavior. The girls are also in the same ESY (summer school) class each year, and that staff will be notified of the need to keep the girls apart as well.
Long story short: I am so grateful for The Princess's support team at school. They obviously care about the kids they work with, and it shows in everything they do. I've always thought of The Fabulous Mrs. G. as a guardian angel to our family, and my conversation with her on Monday only solidified that notion.
Last week, my heart was breaking. Today, I have hope. Hope that this solution will work. Hope that Z will get the help she needs to pinpoint the cause for her aggression and help her and her parents deal with it. Hope that, someday, I can be somebody else's Fabulous Mrs. G.
After the incident at The Princess's spring music program, The Hubbs and I decided to keep The Princess home from school until we reached a resolution. The Fabulous Mrs. G. called me Monday morning, and I learned a lot in the space of about twenty minutes. It seems that The Princess and Z have been paired together for most activities in school recently, and the initial solution involves pairing them off with other classmates to separate them from one another.
Starting on Tuesday, each of the girls has a new partner for each of her activities, and the classroom staff will be keeping a closer eye out for this type of behavior. The girls are also in the same ESY (summer school) class each year, and that staff will be notified of the need to keep the girls apart as well.
Long story short: I am so grateful for The Princess's support team at school. They obviously care about the kids they work with, and it shows in everything they do. I've always thought of The Fabulous Mrs. G. as a guardian angel to our family, and my conversation with her on Monday only solidified that notion.
Last week, my heart was breaking. Today, I have hope. Hope that this solution will work. Hope that Z will get the help she needs to pinpoint the cause for her aggression and help her and her parents deal with it. Hope that, someday, I can be somebody else's Fabulous Mrs. G.
Saturday, May 4, 2013
Physical Aggression in the Classroom
This is the note I had to type and send off to The Princess's teacher this evening. It breaks my heart.
***
I saw videos from the music program today, and I'm completely blown away by how far The Princess has come since the last program. I wish I could have been there, but I'm in San Francisco for work until next Friday...so it was really nice to get the videos that The Hubbs's mom took during the program.
That being said, I am extremely concerned for The Princess's safety. The Hubbs and his mom both saw Z hit The Princess - hard - twice today. Z seems to wait until you and the other staff members are otherwise occupied and then she hits The Princess. The first time was so hard my mother-in-law was absolutely shocked. You turned to talk to her and The Hubbs , and Z punched The Princess very hard in the chest. It happened again when everyone was getting ready to leave. You were occupied with something else, and Z hit The Princess again, this time with an open palm on The Princess's leg. The Hubbs and my mother-in-law didn't want to cause a scene during the program, but I can't leave this unaddressed.
One of the most concerning aspects of this, to me, is that The Princess didn't react at all. This tells me that it happens often enough that The Princess is used to it and doesn't see it as being wrong. This is not okay in any sense of the word.
Being the parent of a nonverbal child like The Princess, The Hubbs and I are extremely vigilant about keeping our eyes on her. She can't tell us if something hurts or if someone did something to her, and we rely on you and the other classroom staff to be our eyes and ears during the school day.
We do absolutely everything in our power to keep her out of harm's way at home, but I feel like there's a gap in this vigilance at school. This academic year alone, The Princess has come home with deep scratches to her face (which have since left scars - the original incident was in October), multiple bruises, bumps, cuts and scrapes. Each time she comes home with an injury, we seem to receive a similar cryptic note regarding an incident with another student.
After today's events, I have no doubt that the other student has been Z, which I suspected all along. I have nothing but respect and gratitude for you and your staff, and I know you do the best you can, but I have to insist that The Princess and Z be separated immediately. I simply cannot stand by and allow this treatment/behavior to continue.
The Princess has made amazing progress in the three years since she started in your program, and I think we would both agree that this is largely due to the fact that we - her parents - and you - her support team - have always been on the same page. It's taken four and a half years, but she is now completely potty-trained. Things take a long time for her to learn, but once they're ingrained, she has a memory like a steel trap. I'm afraid that Z's behavior is teaching The Princess that volatility and violence are acceptable, and this is the exact opposite of what we are teaching and enforcing at home.
We've all worked too hard to get The Princess where she is today to see any regression or bad habits come out of inconsistency at school. Like I said, I'm concerned for her safety at this point. I cannot allow her to continue to be in the same classroom with a child who is physically abusive toward her.
Please let me know what can be done to solve this issue. The Hubbs and I are prepared to keep The Princess home in the interim if needed, and I'll be happy to talk to whoever I need to talk to at the special education district or the local school district. I just can't have my baby bullied. I hope you understand.
Thanks for your time,
Amy
***
Hi Mrs. G.,
I saw videos from the music program today, and I'm completely blown away by how far The Princess has come since the last program. I wish I could have been there, but I'm in San Francisco for work until next Friday...so it was really nice to get the videos that The Hubbs's mom took during the program.
That being said, I am extremely concerned for The Princess's safety. The Hubbs and his mom both saw Z hit The Princess - hard - twice today. Z seems to wait until you and the other staff members are otherwise occupied and then she hits The Princess. The first time was so hard my mother-in-law was absolutely shocked. You turned to talk to her and The Hubbs , and Z punched The Princess very hard in the chest. It happened again when everyone was getting ready to leave. You were occupied with something else, and Z hit The Princess again, this time with an open palm on The Princess's leg. The Hubbs and my mother-in-law didn't want to cause a scene during the program, but I can't leave this unaddressed.
One of the most concerning aspects of this, to me, is that The Princess didn't react at all. This tells me that it happens often enough that The Princess is used to it and doesn't see it as being wrong. This is not okay in any sense of the word.
Being the parent of a nonverbal child like The Princess, The Hubbs and I are extremely vigilant about keeping our eyes on her. She can't tell us if something hurts or if someone did something to her, and we rely on you and the other classroom staff to be our eyes and ears during the school day.
We do absolutely everything in our power to keep her out of harm's way at home, but I feel like there's a gap in this vigilance at school. This academic year alone, The Princess has come home with deep scratches to her face (which have since left scars - the original incident was in October), multiple bruises, bumps, cuts and scrapes. Each time she comes home with an injury, we seem to receive a similar cryptic note regarding an incident with another student.
After today's events, I have no doubt that the other student has been Z, which I suspected all along. I have nothing but respect and gratitude for you and your staff, and I know you do the best you can, but I have to insist that The Princess and Z be separated immediately. I simply cannot stand by and allow this treatment/behavior to continue.
The Princess has made amazing progress in the three years since she started in your program, and I think we would both agree that this is largely due to the fact that we - her parents - and you - her support team - have always been on the same page. It's taken four and a half years, but she is now completely potty-trained. Things take a long time for her to learn, but once they're ingrained, she has a memory like a steel trap. I'm afraid that Z's behavior is teaching The Princess that volatility and violence are acceptable, and this is the exact opposite of what we are teaching and enforcing at home.
We've all worked too hard to get The Princess where she is today to see any regression or bad habits come out of inconsistency at school. Like I said, I'm concerned for her safety at this point. I cannot allow her to continue to be in the same classroom with a child who is physically abusive toward her.
Please let me know what can be done to solve this issue. The Hubbs and I are prepared to keep The Princess home in the interim if needed, and I'll be happy to talk to whoever I need to talk to at the special education district or the local school district. I just can't have my baby bullied. I hope you understand.
Amy
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