To All The Mommas

Well, here we are.  It's the Friday before Mother's Day...time sure flies when you're havin' fun, eh?  Seems like we just packed up all of the Christmas decorations around here, and now we're getting ready for summer.  My spring classes are wrapping up, and everywhere I go people are talking about where they're going on vacation.

In some ways, it feels as though I've just begun school; in others, it seems like forever since the semester started in January.  Last night, I took my finals for my bio class and lab.  That means that I don't have anywhere to be as of 5:00 on Tuesday or Thursday of next week.  Whatever will I do with myself?  After May fourteenth, I'm off for a month before my summer classes pick up.

Perhaps if I was nineteen and living with my parents with no responsibilities, like many of my classmates, I'd be planning a crazy trip.  My month, however, will be much better spent.  I plan to milk every day for all it's worth and spend as many minutes as possible with The Princess when she's not in school herself.

Just over three years ago, my priorities changed forever.  Being a momma sure ain't for the faint of heart, is it?  I've been fortunate enough to know many mothers in my life, and I'd like to take this opportunity to thank each and every one of you...for mothers not only teach their children; they also teach passersby, other people's children, and other mothers.

***

Grandma Irene, my mom's mom, taught me more than I could ever possibly hope to convey.  But that's okay...I know the lessons I kept from her.  They include humility, comeraderie, love, devotion, humor, zest for life, how to get a dachshund to follow a flapping fish from the sea wall to the deck, and how to light a fire using nothing but a damp old box of matches and freshly cut grass clippings, among many others.  One of the most important things Grandma ever taught me was that you'll never know if you don't try.

***

Grandma Dorothy, who grew up on a farm in Kansas (I kid you not) was my dad's mom.  She taught me to play dominos, inspired me to sing in the church choir, and showed me that little old ladies can be cool as hell.  She taught me (indirectly) to always look under the top layer, and always ask what's in the dish before eating it.  She taught me that pretzel crusts on a cheesecake, while they may sound tempting, are the epitomy of disgusting...especially when the salt is left on.  She taught me 1001 uses for peanuts, 1000 of which should never have been invented in the first place.  From her, I learned to properly set a table, as well as how to make the best damned taco salad in the history of the world.  Best of all, she taught me that there's no reason to click my heels...I can go home whenever I want to.

***

The Hubbs' mom is one of the kindest people I've ever met, and I'm not just saying that because she reads this blog religiously.  Never before have I come into contact with anyone more willing to help anyone - everyone - else in any way possible.  Nana, you've shown me what it is like to marry into the right family.  You are kind, sweet, caring, and more than I ever could have asked for in a mother-in-law.  I'm perfectly well aware of the fact that most gals never get this lucky, and I'm thankful every day.  One of my favorite lessons taken from you is that it's okay to laugh at myself.

***

The Hubbs' maternal grandma is a one-of-a-kind, super-special lady.  After a lifetime together, she and Grandpa are still madly in love, and it's beyond adorable.  I can only hope that The Hubbs and I are lucky enough to be in the same position in forty years.  She and her entire family have opened their homes and their hearts to me, and I could not be more grateful.

***

Though I didn't have the honor of knowing her for very long, The Hubbs' paternal grandma was one of the sweetest people I've ever met.  She taught me that it's all about family, and that doesn't mean just blood.

***

Jello...my sweet, wonderful, perfect sister (in-law).  K-Bear's momma, who is expecting a second little bundle of joy in August.  Who'da ever thought we'd be where we are today, lady?  Things have changed a lot in the six or so years we've known each other.  You've taught me one of the most important lessons I'll ever learn: sisters are there for each other.  It was totally worth the wait to find that out later in life, especially since it meant we didn't have to go through the hair-pulling emotional rollercoaster of adolescence together.  You've also shown me that good things really do come to those who wait.  Just look at you with your Hank and your K-Bear and your little Belly Baby...I'm so happy for you, doll.  Really.  If I was given the choice of anyone in the world to be my sister, you'd win by a landslide.

***

Aunt Cheri, oh, where do I start?  We haven't seen each other in eons, but when we reconnected on FB it seemed as though we were picking up right where we left off.  I have such fond memories of spending the night at your house when I was a kid...for some reason, everything was so much more fun there!  You guys had the first Nintendo in the family, and I'd be surprised if we didn't wear that thing out.  The "Dry Night Fairy"...remember that?  The mere fact that you introduced me to conditioner and detangler makes you a saint.  I remember thinking your bath tub was way better than ours, and for some reason I always wanted to slide down the slopey part.  Coloring on your kitchen table, you taught me that it was okay to peel back the paper from the crayon when it started getting worn down...seriously, up until that point, the idea had never occurred to me.  We made candles from leftover crayon wax, and did so many other wonderful things.  Nothing in the world could make me happier than the knowledge that you were finally able to become a momma.  The whole world knew you were made for it...it was simply meant to be.  And I want you to know that - to this day - I can't help but smile when I hear a Southern accent.  It always makes me think of you.

***

Momma, what can I say?  Everything I do is your fault...if you never would have had me, I never would have done any of it.  And for that, I thank you.  So your sense of time isn't all that great...but you taught me patience.  Your bullshit meter is among the best in the world...with this, you taught me that I'm nowhere near as good a liar as I thought I was.  You've put up with all of my shenanigans over the years, always welcoming me back after each colossal screw-up.  Somehow, you've managed not to hold those screw-ups over my head as a constant reminder.  You've taught me that it's okay to mess up, and that - when I do - it's okay to take some time to come to that conclusion on my own.  You've shown me that it's okay to go to Florida for a haircut every once in a while...as long as purple highlights are involved.  You've helped me play hookie from school, including that time in eighth grade that you and Aunt Cheri busted me out on a lark.  That was one of the best days.  You've helped me to see that I don't always have to follow the rules...most, if not all, of them have at least a little bend to work with.  Do you know that, to this day, I've never worked on my birthday?  Or The Hubbs' birthday...or The Princess's.  That's one of my very favorite things about growing up, something that will stick with me forever.  You've taught me to be tough;  you've taught me to be sensitive; you've taught me to be sane; you've taught me to be crazy; you've taught me to be selfless.  You've taught me it's okay to cry.  You've helped me see that saying, "I'm sorry" is not a sign of weakness.  You, more than anyone else in the whole wide world...you have taught me to be a mom.

***

To all the moms in my life - those who are mentioned here, as well as those who are not - I thank you.  I've learned so much from all of you, and I love you dearly.  While you're out to brunch with your family this Sunday, or planting your flats of flowers, I'll be thinking of you.

And if you're looking for something to do, I'd suggest taking just a few minutes to think about the mommas who have touched your life.  It's amazing when you really get into it, and a little freaky to think about where we'd be without all of our mommy mentors.  It's a rather humbling exercise, in a good way.   Makes me feel more connected, and - these days - I'll take all of that I can get.